Tuesday, 10 March 2009

Pallone per il calcio

I don't support a team, not a big fan at all, never have been.

However, things did change a few years ago after I met and became good friends with a Man Utd supporter! Since that time I've watched a game or two on the box with him and I have to say I always enjoy the experience. 

Funnily enough, on Friday I was asked by my Head if I would escort our school's 5 aside football team to a tournament, she had double booked and couldn't make the trip. To be quite honest the request didn't appeal to me at all but of course I said 'yes' because I wanted to help out.

I had to make my own way to the venue and got hopelessly lost (turning up fifteen minutes late) but thankfully I hadn't missed a game. It wasn't long before I'd gathered a little valuable information: no off side rule, no swapping ends due to the matches only lasting eight minutes.

I listened carefully to the yelling supporters and soon found myself joining in, shouting "Mark him!", "Aw ref!" and "Go on my son!" (not). I even doubled up as physio and applied some vaseline to a nasty scrape (I discovered astro turf 's a bugger if you're unfortunate enough to meet it with your knees).

It turned out to be a great afternoon for us, winning the league, quarter finals, semi finals and final, an event that hadn't happened in a long while. I felt really chuffed and was more than glad to have been there and seen their big win.

Today I was asked if I could accompany the lads to the next stage in the game, apparently I've been adopted as their lucky mascot! This time round I didn't hesitate to say 'Yes' and nearly cheered  'Bring it on!' (do they say that in football?!)

I might find out who the opposing teams are and get my Man Utd friend to pen some chants for me!



Monday, 9 March 2009

I have this friend (ha!)

She's 40 something and over the winter months she's put on weight. Not stones by any means but enough to feel uncomfortable around the waistline (6lbs to be exact).  

She's a little concerned, feels 'big' sometimes, seeing the unwelcome spread of flesh in the mirror. She feels her derriere has spread too but still finds it hard to cut out the snacks every night.

I tell her 'What's it going to take for you to realise that if you carry on eating this way you'll soon have a stone to move before you know it!' 

She wants to be slimmer and tanned for the summer, she wants to be able to give those younger girls a run for their money when the short skirts and pretty dresses come out of the wardrobe. 

I told her that she just needs to stick up pics of Beth Ditto all around the kitchen as a stark reminder of what her body could look like if she doesn't stop being a pig (I know it sounds harsh but sometimes the girl needs a slap!).

You have to feel sexy to look sexy right? 

I'll definitely stick with her throughout this ordeal, after all what friends are for? It's got to be done, even the sit-ups?! 

Just think 'slim, sexy, confident, slim, sexy.....' 


Thursday, 5 March 2009

I want that big, hot........

..... shiny, yellow star back in our skies.

Some say spring has sprung (as of 1st of March to be precise) and I say 'poppycock'! Surely Spring starts towards the end of this month? It still feels and looks like winter to me, all you gotta do is step outside!

When the daffodils start blooming on the green at the end of my road, then I will know it has arrived at my place. 

Monday, 2 March 2009


"Look, I don't want to wax philosophic, but I will say that if you're alive you've got to flap your arms and legs. You've got to jump around a lot, for life is the very opposite of death, and therefore you must, at the very least, think noisy and colorfully or you're not alive".
Mel Brooks